


I’m On A Llama

by ashleybenlove



Category: Emperor's New Groove (2000), Old Spice Commercials
Genre: Community: disney_kink, Crack, F/M, Gen, M/M, This is ridiculous, i don't know what this is, technically Kronk/Old Spice Guy is onesided, the ships are barely there?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 15:28:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14697036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashleybenlove/pseuds/ashleybenlove
Summary: Yzma, Kronk, and Kuzco meet the Old Spice Guy.





	I’m On A Llama

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this anonymously in March 2012 on the Disney Kink Meme for the prompt: "Yzma/Old Spice Guy. The Man Your Emperor Could Smell Like."
> 
> I used some of the script of the Old Spice commercials.

Yzma stood next to Kronk and in front of them stood the Emperor Kuzco and a man known only as “Old Spice.” Old Spice was a dark-skinned muscular man, who was dressed in a skirt like Kronk’s, and that was it. He was shorter than Kronk, and a few inches taller than Kuzco. He held some kind of container. 

“Hello, miss. Look at your Emperor, now look at me,” Old Spice said quickly.

They did what they were told.

“Now look at your Emperor, now look at me,” Old Spice said. 

“We just did that!” Yzma exclaimed.

“Your Emperor… he is not me,” Old Spice said.

“That’s true,” Kuzco said.

“Yeah, definitely not this gentleman,” Kronk agreed. 

“Smell me!” Old Spice exclaimed.

“What?” Yzma, Kronk, and Kuzco all said at the same time.

“Smell me!” Old Spice said. 

Yzma approached him and sniffed him briefly. He smelled heavenly. Like ambrosia and the jungle after rain. It was delicious. 

“Kronk smell him!” Yzma hissed at her lackey.

Kronk did what he was told and sighed contently. He did not say anything but patted Old Spice’s shoulder in reverence before Old Spice said quickly, “Don’t touch me.”

“Sorry,” Kronk said.

“Now smell your Emperor,” Old Spice said.

Yzma and Kronk smelled Kuzco at the same time.

“No smelly!” Kuzco said.

“Be quiet,” Old Spice said quickly. 

He watched them look unhappy after they smelled Kuzco.

“Your Emperor sadly is not me, but if he used Old Spice body wash, he could smell like he’s me,” Old Spice said. 

He handed Yzma the container. 

“I’m on a llama,” Old Spice said, magically appearing on a llama. He winked at Yzma, Kronk waved at Old Spice. Old Spice then snapped his fingers and disappeared.


End file.
